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Deceased Voters for Kerry

posted Thursday, 28 October 2004

Deceased Voters for Kerry - New Life for the Kerry Campaign

Deceased voters may bring new life to John Kerry's campaign in the final moments of the Presidential election, currently a dead heat. When every vote counts, dead voters may be the deciding factor. While just a few hundred dead voters carried the day for Lyndon Johnson when he ran for the Senate in Texas many years ago, in the 2004 Presidential Election, tens of thousands of deceased voters are expected to make their voices be heard, especially in critical states like Wisconsin. Preliminary polling indicates that Kerry commands an impressive lead among the dead, with over 95% of likely dead voters favoring the Democractic candidate.

"He's like one of us - very down to earth," said Amanda Hutchinson, a deceased voter originally from nineteenth century New Hampshire. "Me and most of my friends will be voting for him on Nov. 2 - as many times as we can." Hutchinson, speaking through official Democratic campaign channelers, explained that this will be her first time voting since passing away, and noted that "all the rhetoric from Bush has made a lot of us turn over in our graves. Now it's time to bury him."

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1. a reader left...
Friday, 29 October 2004 5:26 pm

This is not funny, mainly because I have been saying this for months---the dead will do anything to elect one of their own! And they have the most sinister forces of all waiting to enforce their right to vote: lawyers!
I hope this will be even funnier next Wednesday when Bush wins in a landslide.

Michael Ervin


2. a reader left...
Saturday, 30 October 2004 8:42 am

Speaking of the "dead" sloagn--What ever happened to that "Dead or Alive" bravado of George Bush, refering to Osama bin Laden? For all his flight jacket swagger and smirk, we see the real results of "I am not really concerned" about him reflected in yesterday's video.

Guy

Guy [nipomolaw@aol.com]


3. a reader left...
Tuesday, 4 January 2005 7:37 pm

Bush talks to God he says. Is Jesus in support of the trickle down theory (spoil the rich and the middle class can get the crumbs that fall from their table)? Is Jesus big on pre-emptive war against a country that wasn't a threat? Is Jesus in support of rolling back so many EPA rules? I think not. John Kerry wasn't a good candidate but he still would have been better than W who wants to take away overtime.

Kevin


4. a reader left...
Saturday, 19 March 2005 6:59 am

Why is it so hard to understand that the conservative policies are not designed to "spoil the rich" but instead let individuals keep what they earn - why should government continue to take earned income from the wealthy and, after they take their share, redistribute the stolen money to individuals who made poor life choices.

Matt Rinaldo [fourfootbanger@yahoo.com]